L'Italo-Americano

THURSDAY, JUNE 30, 2022 www.italoamericano.org 20 L'Italo-Americano T here's a plethora o f a r t i c l e s o u t t h e r e o n w h a t n o t t o d o t o a v o i d s e l f - p r o c l a m a t i o n o f " I ' m a tourist!" when visiting Italy. Much of it is worthy advice… unless you prefer sticking out. However, many of these eye-openers for the stranieri (foreigners) go beyond ways to circumvent disagreeable tourist behavior and are, in fact, related to everyday life in Italy. While many long-standing customs seem strange (at least at first) to v i s i t o r s , a n y o n e w i t h a n o p e n m i n d a n d a n o p e n heart quickly grows fond of these seemingly quirky ways of la vita Italiana (the Ital- ian life). Well, possibly apart f r o m t h e n o n s e n s i c a l bureaucracy, but that seems t o b e a p r o b l e m s h a r e d around the world! C o n v e n t i o n s o f l i f e i n Italy vary by region, even by v i l l a g e , b u t w e ' l l e x p l o r e here a subset of habits that permeate the way Italians live. Passionate about food I t ' s c e r t a i n l y n o t n e w s that Italians are passionate about food. We're not talk- ing about puppy love, how- ever, but full-on lustful pas- sion! After a friendly "Come va?", the next question is generally "Cos'hai mangiato per …?" (What did you eat for …). The news on the rest of the world's topics can wait — reverence for food is real. How many times has an Ital- ian friend assured me that their town's pasta or wine or salumi is the best – gli altri sono terribili (the others are terrible)! There are some unwritten food rules, howev- er, that the non-Italian must pay heed to: If you've ever reached out for a pleasing squeeze of the beautiful produce found in Italian markets, you learned q u i c k l y t h a t t o t o c c a r e (touch) is a no-no. Super- markets differ, but not slip- ping on the provided plastic glove before handling pro- duce will reward you with a side stare or two. Mealtimes are also some- what iconic in Italy. Lunch is long; shops in all but the large cities typically close for several hours to make time f o r e a t i n g a n d r e s t i n g a t home. For many American tourists, Italian dinner hours are puzzling. If you're hun- g r y b e f o r e 7 : 3 0 p m w h e n most restaurants open, treat yourself to an aperitivo to quiet the rumbles until the more typical dining time of 9:00pm. And one will never be rushed through a meal by an anxious waiter! The bill must be requested, and only after leisurely enjoying every element of the meal. L a b e l l a f i g u r a – t h a t i n n a t e a b i l i t y o f l o o k i n g e f f o r t l e s s l y c o o l – c o m e s crashing down if the error is m a d e o f s t u f f i n g a q u i c k meal down on the go. You just won't see Italians push- ing back a burger in the car or rushing down the side- w a l k w i t h a g r a n d e - s i z e d coffee concoction glued in their hand – che schifo! Please, peel your fruit. Just because. The secret to perfect health? Never do this…! I t ' s r a t h e r s i m p l e . T o avoid most ailments, pay mind to these customs that are as much an entrenched part of life in Italy as coffee from a Moka pot. Y o u w i l l n e v e r s e e a n y rationally minded person leave their Italian home with wet hair. While it might look beachy or allude to "Hey, I just worked out!" here, in Italy it's a deft invitation to cervicale… an ailment that c a n a f f e c t o n e j u s t a b o u t anywhere from the top of the h e a d d o w n t o t h e u p p e r chest. But not only can wet hair bring this on; there is also… Colpo d'aria – (getting hit by air) any type of moving air (including air condition- ing) threatens with a host of maladies from disrupting d i g e s t i o n t o i n i t i a t i n g a who's-who list of bodily ails. It's easy to avoid, though. Conscientious use of neck scarves, practical outerwear, and sporting a maglia della salute (a wool vest – shirt of health) at least until the last t h r e a t o f w i n t e r a b a t e s improves the odds greatly. Can't blame it on wet hair or a blast of air? Must be il c a m b i o d i s t a g i o n e ( t h e change of seasons). Fever, fatigue, aches, weight gain, e v e n t h e u r g e t o s h o p … blame it on the nefarious change of seasons. Bureaucracy, bidets, bad luck, and more Not all peculiar habits of life in Italy are related to food and weather. While we all deal with layers of frus- tration related to bureau- cracy, dealing with Italian o f f i c i a l d o m c a n b r i n g a s u p e r - s i z e d m a l d i t e s t a ( h e a d a c h e ) . B e s i d e s t h e plethora of forms, official stamps, and multiple-office trips required for just about any government-controlled document, even the seem- ingly simple can be compli- cated. Post offices serve as bill paying stations, but if you need a postage stamp f i n d t h e n e a r e s t t o b a c c o shop. Want to file for a pass- port? Go to the police sta- tion. You might find yourself there anyway if you house your pet goldfish in a round bowl when in Rome, wear noisy flip flops in Capri, or take your last breath in Fal- ciano del Massico where it's been illegal to die since 2012. Yep, Italian bureau- cracy! And while on the topic of laws, did you know a bidet is not only an institution of proper hygiene, but also a l e g a l r e q u i r e m e n t ? S i n c e 1 9 7 5 a l l n e w b u i l d s a r e required to install a bidet – but of course. Often puzzling to Americans, these devices are a staple in one form or another throughout Italy. As they say, try it – you'll like it! Warding off bad luck is a part of any culture. Avoid number 13? Not in Italy. To f a r e t r e d i c i – m a k e 1 3 – means to hit the jackpot. Beware, though, of number 1 7 . I t s R o m a n n u m e r a l s counterpart XVII makes a nifty anagram of the Latin word "vixi", meaning "my life is over." Yikes. Another traditional ges- ture of good luck, at least for I t a l i a n m e n a n d m a y b e Michael Jackson, is a quick grab of their "attributi" to either ward off something m a l i c i o u s o r i n h o p e s o f good fortune. However, an Italian court (2006) ruled this expression of buona for- tuna "an act contrary to pub- lic decency" – touching of privates must only be done in private. D i d y o u r m o t h e r t e a c h you it's not polite to stare? You won't hear that from an Italian mama. People watch- ing is practically a sport in Italy; it's quite normal to gaze longer than a moment o r t w o , n o i l l - i n t e n t involved. Asking one's age or weight is also considered allowable, and possibly the fictitious answers that might go with it! Life in Italy is full of won- derful customs and tradi- tions, all woven into the fab- r i c o f w h a t m a k e s I t a l y … well…Italy! While some may seem peculiar to the out- sider, the novelty is part of the joy of sharing in the Ital- ian lifestyle – may you fare tredici! Being outside with wet hair can be the cause of many an ailment in Italy! (Photo: Marco Crupi/Shutterstock) PAULA REYNOLDS LA VITA ITALIANA TRADITIONS HISTORY CULTURE W e t h a i r j u s t m i g h t k i l l you: peculiar customs and habits of life in Italy

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